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depressed bestie1

depressed bestie2

If you have a best friend who you think may be suffering from depression, here is an article from a teen who has had experience with depression within her own family life. It might just help you make sense of it all...

MEZONE IT IS NOT ABOUT IVE AND I IVUST NOTTAKE THEIR ACTIONS PERSONALLY. IT STILL HURTS THOUGH IM HUMAN 401.400' Through my teenage life, most of my significant people have suffered from depression. It really scared me that I was losing them, and also because I wondered when it would hit me. Even though I knew — more like hoped — that they still loved me, they just didn't want to be with me. They would isolate themselves and most of the time I didn't even know what the real issues were. Excuses were the order of the day. It was hard not to get angry, even though I felt guilty for it. I would ask myself is it worth waiting indefinitely for things to improve? Where do I draw the line between being loyal and being a doormat? Sometimes I felt like I was the one messing up, because they wouldn't let me be a source of safety and stability for them. 1.A continuous sense of sadness. A lack of interest in everyday tasks and activities. A lack of energy and concentration and wanting to sleep all the time. Feelings of inadequacy or inexplicable guilt. A change in eating habits. Sometimes, recurring thoughts of suicide. Depression becomes a third party and it can alter a person's behaviour without much of their control. Your bestie will say she can handle this on her own and refuse help. She most likely does not want to appear weak and will push you away if you force help on her. Here are a few tips on how to be there for her... BE SUBTLE ABOUT WHAT YOU DO Don't make her feel like she can't think or do things for herself. The most positive changes come when people have their own realisations. THINGS THAT YOU CAN DO Healthy eating is very important. If your bestie is taking a little too much to junk food, maybe bring extra fruit with your lunch and offer it to her. Also invite her to do some exercise with you. HELPING OTHERS IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL Find a place to do community service, especially something that involves children, and take your best friend along. It is important not to make it about her. Remember be subtle. CREATE A SAFE SPACE FOR HER TO TALK This means doing a lot of listening and holding back judgement. Give room for outbursts such as, ''Nobody understands what I am going through.'' Be patient and point out the bright side of things. MEDICATION If she is taking medication, you can help her to remember to take it at the right time each day. We all have our strengths and our weaknesses, but what happens when someone becomes their own enemy? You, as her best friend, can look out for her and if you think she is possibly suicidal, immediately talk to someone who can help. If at any point you feel like it is too big of a responsibility, it is okay to step back and get her family or a teacher involved. It can be a very hurtful experience and you need to look after yourself as well. Adolescence is a confusing and difficult time. We want to walk to the beat of our own drum, but we don't really have control over our lives yet. Everything is changing and it is difficult to stay true to ourselves. When someone treats you badly, try to think of where they might be coming from, and let it go. Love and respect yourself and you will be surrounded by people who love and respect you. '& The South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) is a non-profit organisation that offers free professional counselling staff who man the phones between 8am and 8pm every day of the week. Reach them at sadag.org, the Suicide Crisis Line on 0800 567 567 or SMS 31393. They are there to help, so don't be afraid to call. You can remain anonymous too if that will make it easier. DEPRESSION? teenzonemagazine.co.za